Thursday, April 29, 2010

90 Days to a Better You | Not in His Goals, But in His Transitions Man is Great - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Here lately, I have been doing a lot of reflecting, prayer, meditation and self discovery; all in the hopes of becoming a better person. As we know, in order to evolve in life, we must first asses our short comings, and work like hell to change them. Assessing those pesky bad habits with an objective eye can be very hard, especially when you find fault within yourself.

Changing your life, begins with changing your attitude; and changing your attitude begins with changing your mindset. So that is where I began. I began to analyze my inner thoughts, challenge my motivation and desires; and I must say through it all, it has been somewhat of a cathartic experience. Granted my life hasn't changed over night, but my outlook [once pessimistic] has changed, my work habits [once a procrastinator] have improved, and my attitude [once cautious and reserved] is slowly blossoming into the person I was meant to be.

I want to share these tips with all of you, in hopes that you too can apply this information to your daily life. I am not here to preach, but to pay it forward. I am breaking this up into 3 easy to digest posts [one a week], to spare you the novel!

Here are a few tasks that should be completed during Day 1 - 30
Decide whether or not you want to make a change. This may sound ludicrous, but changing your mindset requires a considerable amount of commitment. - Are you happy [not content] with your life as it is now? If you aren't happy, but aren't willing to make the change as of yet; ask yourself why. - If you are ready for this undertaking, write out a contract to yourself; in this contract outline your expectations, and consequences should you happen to breach your contract.

Write down your short term, and long term goals. Be as specific as possible; the more specific your goals, the more real your visions become. [Don't worry or stress yourself about setting dates at this point

Organize your goals; [For example. Finances, Career, Education, Marriage]

Assess the motivation behind your goals. Is it greed? Is it to prove yourself? Is it to keep up with the Joneses? Is it pressure? Is it guilt? Or is it passion? The key here is to eliminate the narcissistic motivation behind your goals. In other words, do not let selfishness order your steps. The key to successfully completing this task is h o n e s t y.

Start a journal and record your thoughts about steps 1-4. I recommend writing in a journal at least once a week. Things I normally write about are;
Everyday struggles
How to WIN the battle [between what I know is right, and taking the easy way out]
How to make MORE progress

Take baby steps; work slowly and methodically towards those goals you listed in step 2. Try to put in an hours worth of work each week towards a goal. The purpose of this is to get you used to consistently working towards goals, in hopes that it systematically changes those bad habits that prohibits growth and success. This is part of the re-wiring process. 

As you can see, days 1-30 consists more of writing in your journal and slowly [one hour a week] chipping towards those goals mentioned in step 2. 

Stay tuned next week for days 30-60!  


  1. I have been doing alot of thinking about writing again and getting my goals in order, on paper. Thank you for reconfirm this for me, I'm going to start back today! :)

  2. Back in February I was in a bad car accident. My liver was lacerated; it was all bad.
    There were a million other things not going well in my life -- and I was told that if I dont begin to change me, they'll only get worse.
    Since then I've been doing the SAME exact things you described.
    I'm glad to know I'm doing SOMETHING right!

  3. I love, love, love this post! It's definitely something I need to start doing.

  4. it's crazy that you post this because I have been thinking about a similar topic for the past few days. You just inspired me to write it despite the insecurities I was having with the post :)

  5. I needed this..I'm currently in the process of doing just this and revamp my life for the better. good post!

    p.s. come on over to afroniquely you and say hello :)

  6. Thanks soooo much Nikole!!! You are so on point!! I have recently been feeling down and out about things going on, and where I am in my life. Recently, I was trying to think of a way to have a more positive attitude, in the midst of feeling hopeless at times... This is perfect timing!! I'm off to buy a cute journal. Lol..Thanks again :D

  7. @ShandyLand You are welcome! Glad you are back at it, and there is no better time than the present!

    @GlamGoonsLLC Nothing like a little positive affirmation; You are DEFINITELY doing something right! Way to go on recovery as well! It wasn't your time to go!

    @Dania Thank you so much!

    @SEWING STARDOM I am GLAD! Please do write it!

    @Shae GOOD!!! We are all a body of work, the hardest part of the battle is deciding whether or not you are up to the challenge! You have already crossed that bridge!

    Mimi504 GREAT!!! Writing in a journal, and having time for introspect; is a healthy way of getting through difficult times in your life. I am glad you found this post useful!

  8. Self reflection is always a good thing. I love the post and it has inspired me to keep in the direction I'm headed to find the Me I want to be!


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